photo by Aaron Burden

Back to the Basics Part 1: Are the teachings on marriage, family and sex really essential to the Gospel message?

 

by Mandy Cox

 

It can appear that the Church’s teachings regarding sex, marriage, and family have little to do with the Gospel message. After all, our own Protestant brothers and sisters, and even some of our fellow Catholics, seem to effectively teach the Gospel message while departing from the Catholic teachings in these areas. Isn’t the Gospel really about serving the poor and loving one another? Can’t I just be a “good person” without following these “rules”?

These are valid questions.

Of course, these are very real and valid questions. Christ didn’t teach about gender dysphoria, elective sterilization, or artificial insemination. It is even more confusing as science and technology appear to outpace clear teaching on complex and personal issues. Christians seem divided on these issues as well.

We must look to what Christ did give us: The two greatest commandments (Matthew 22:35-40). Perhaps by exploring these two commandments, we can begin to find our answers. After all, Christ said, “On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:40).

BACK TO THE BASICS

You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.

We find in this commandment the core to understanding the teachings the Church gives us. Before we ask how to live this out, perhaps we should ask why. Why should we love the Lord without reserve? The essential answer is justice. Justice can be defined as giving what is owed. Why do we owe God such total devotion? Primarily because he made us. Our very being comes from him as a free gift. We are not self-created beings. Instead, we receive our very self as a gift from the One who loves and made us. We are made for him. Out of justice due Him, we are called to give our whole selves back as an act of devotion and love. And true love demands exclusive, total, sincere love from the beloved. This kind of love involves our whole self.

You shall love your neighbor as yourself.

In a world that markets self-love, it often misses the mark on what it means to love oneself. If we can’t get this right, how can we truly love our neighbor as ourselves? The love of ourselves is to choose and will the good for ourselves. Not simply any good but the ultimate good. Self-love is the reminder that we are made for our heavenly home, and to not settle for the earthly comforts that can distract us from our true destiny.

Love of neighbor is the same. I have a responsibility to my neighbor to assist them with reaching eternal happiness. My neighbor is not to be used, abused, degraded, or destroyed as a means to please me. Rather I am called to “lay down my life” for my neighbor. This kind of love is demonstrated for us on the Cross.

From rules to a recipe for love.

Any rule can feel like a burden to freedom if we do not understand its purpose. However, the Church’s teachings are broader and deeper than the rules associated with them. The rules are meant to set a clear boundary, but they do not encompass the whole teaching.

In the coming posts, we will unpack the teachings that challenge us the most. These areas are deeply personal and deserve sincere attention. These posts will not give a long, detailed explanation of the full teaching. Instead, the goal of Everyday Ethics is to treat complex issues in easy-to-grasp installments.